When Was It

When was it I stop complaining,
Nor asking things from my very own family,
Was it an ordinary feeling among the family itself,
Or was it just me keep feeling i own them so many things.

To my dear sister whom i always talk to when i was small,
The one who created a map for my treasure hunt,
The one who taught ABC really well and give me homework,
My dearest sister whom i took as my role model,
When in the end,
I couldn't ask nor tell what i truly wanted.

My distant dad the one whom i'm scared of,
Even until today i'm still unable to talk to him,
Not of respect i'm scared of him but out of fear,
And for now i never tell him what i wanted even for food or money,
Was it because i lose hope in him or because of his words,
That left a deep scar whenever i see or near him.

How did i get so awkward towards my family,
When did i ever lose them though i am so close,
Them whom i treat so awkwardly,
Was it because of my concern towards their feeling that i break my own heart,
Giving out the poker face that i'm perfect at i act my role,
As a consoler i am and as a friend i am,
But when did i become so far away from them,
Was it because of my broken heart or was it because of my dying hope,
When was it did i lose my family who are so close but yet so far,,,

In this matter

For whom i make myself happy?
Is it wasn't for someone or a dream of mine that i hold,
I'm going down the hill,
Falling as if i can never see the bottom,
Thanks to that i mange to hold onto the very thin root hanging along the way,
I tend to climb up once more,
Dragging along the pouring blood and the dirty scar,
My greatest desire just keep on fighting the hardship.

One can never resist the living of love,
Falling for someone as they fall back at you,
When you thought that is all that you ever wanted,
The unexpected happen to the very moment you put hope upon it,
Thus after the very break up,
You tend to break and forget to mend yourself,
Living in a world tempted with sins,
You start pushing your very limit,
Until the very light shine upon you giving you a chance to forgive yourself.

In every family it was a rather happy ending,
You have children and see them growing up ease your pain,
But life can never end that way so easily,
When the karma calls upon you,
Everything starts to break down,
Forgetting the sweetness that you share,
The same hardships that you went through,
Of who the money belongs seems to be the talk of the town,
The very innocent child witness the sins that they make,
For the unfortunate reasons no one will be able to help them,
As they keep on breaking and tearing the very innocent heart.

So much for a happy ending that they hope,
But whatever will happen if they realize it earlier,
However will they be able to fix everything that has been done,
It turns to another karma that calls,
As every human being keep on making the same mistakes again.

About Her

Didn't they warn you about the trouble with women?
How they can easily learn the bad influence that you show,
When you cheated on them,
They might forgive it but they can never forget,
There's always be a revenge of every action that you do wrong.

Didn't they warn you about the unspeakable of a women?
Where they can easily understand man and use it against them,
How their thinking is much more complicated than we thought,
How their plan will always becomes a danger towards man,
Though gentle as they are but once their heart is tested,
They grow very violent.

Didn't they warn you about the smallest thing that women sees?
How they observe every angle of the lives of man,
How they somehow plan their own way to get them,
Softhearted as they may but it is wise not to taint their heart black,
For every pain that you cause,
You wish you would want her forgiveness.